Lesson: Being charged to live out moments differently
The importance of a moment. Thinking about this concept, I’m not actually sure when I learned this lesson. But maybe a few stories will help me process and hopefully challenge you along the way.
Story Time!
I remember my pastor back home taking me to lunch before I left for college. There was one thing in particular he said that I’ll never forget. In regards to my family’s more than decade-long service at that church, he told me, “People like your family, you’ll do anything for.” This was coming from the man who had taken substantial amounts of money from his own wallet to help my mother as she worked hard and struggled to take care of her children. The man who’s done the same for me in my adult life. I knew he meant it.
It’s moments like these that I match my character against to quantify the kind of man I am. One who values people, faithfulness, and sacrifice.
Another Story
I also remember starting to serve a new church during my time in college. I didn’t have a car, so I’d spend tons of money (that I didn’t have) taking Ubers just to have the opportunity to serve the church. One day, I walked into a room and asked a group I’d served with if I could have a ride home after several hours of volunteering my time to help them. I could have walked home in the time it took to finally begin to garner a response.
One long pause and two BS responses later, I’d learned in retrospect that moments are life-defining. This made me become a man who has given rides to people no questions asked because I know what it’s like to feel like an inconvenience to people who don’t care to serve you. (Ironically, I’m an Uber driver now, but that’s beside the point!)
Didn’t always believe struggle lasts this long
I knew for sure happiness was in reach
And I thought by now I’d be far from here
But when I’m not numb all I can feel is pain
I find comfort when around good folk
But that love don’t make its way back to me
A moment’s just a moment, I’m a ghost again
My momma said I was great, I guess they just don’t know
“Untitled” by Christian Sanders
A Few Lessons
The idea, at least in my mind, is that the consistencies we experience in day-to-day life become too mundane to inspire and spark change. (Oddly enough, building consistency is the only way to accomplish change, but I think that’s just one of life’s weird, quirky paradoxes.)
A prophet is honored everywhere except in his own hometown and among his own people. Jesus said that. Why? Probably because the people you encounter regularly become nothing more than regular encounters. You naturally devalue things (and people) with frequency.
Personally, I have had very little visible influence on those I love most, but in some places I’ve been most respected and most useful among strangers, and it’s lead to positive change.
Some Final Stories
Who knows if any one thing leads to lifelong change? But I must say that oftentimes the only sense of joy I can find is within a moment, that small moments tend to draw out the greatest change for me, and that all I can do is hope that the moments I create manage to pair with several others to bring about change in this world.
Regardless, many of these moments, big or small, I’ll never forget.
The Russian girl getting out of my Uber after a long conversation about Russian culture, American culture, Black culture, racism, relationships, and so on. In the happiest of voices, “Oh my gosh! This was great! Thank you!”
The lawyer who hates his job but finds it frightening to start over after so many years and so much money spent pursuing law. I told him he should go for it. “Maybe I will.”
The advertiser who works for NBC who shared how disheartening it is to secure advertisements for such a high-profile organization (including Superbowl commercials, likely the most expensive and highly recognized advertisements in the world) and still have his family of lawyers not be proud of him because he isn’t a lawyer.
The singer who bluntly said, “My mom hates me” because I stopped pursuing my medical degree, and now I sing full-time. “But I’m happier doing what I love.”
The restaurant worker who remembers my breakfast order every Saturday and has no restraint expressing her vigorous, vibrant, down-to-earth, kindly sarcastic personality. “Oh, you think you’re special?”
On a personal note
We remember moments. We usually don’t remember frequent exchanges until some form of tragedy turns frequency into nostalgia.
Most days I find myself searching for a reason to live–or rather, a reason to want to. My ultimate decision is unaffected: I will live no matter what. Purpose and calling don’t seem to matter to most people, but they matter to me more than anything. However, the vibrance of that decision at times becomes impossible without an element of want.
So what makes me want to live? Those moments: A conversation. A smile. A hello. A friendly expression of “Hey, I remember your name, and you matter to me.”
Why? Because sometimes there’s nothing and no one to count on. Bad things happen to everyone, but sometimes life is more bad with some good things happening than it is good with some bad things happening. And sometimes the small, simple things–the things that only last for a moment–are the most inconsistent beauties–often, the only beauty.
My encouragement: make moments. Make them well. And make them bright.
Unapologetically Christian 
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